Kansas City Counseling Blog

Recently, one of my friends from my Masters program had an idea to start a blog dedicated to counseling and its numerous facets. Once this site was up and running, I, along with others from my program, were asked to come on as authors and write articles on various issues relevant to the counseling profession. While this site is still pretty green, I must say that I am really excited to see where it leads. My hope is that it provides information to those who are either unaware or skeptical of our profession, all in the hopes of facilitating both learning and healing to those in need. Give the site a look and be sure to check back regularly because we will be posting weekly! 

KC Counseling Blog

Bachelorette Weekend in Chicago!

Less than 24 hours until I will be reunited with some of my best friends in one of the coolest cities I have ever been to, Chicago! I'm looking forward to (and desperately in need of) some good quality girl time! I will be sure to post pictures and spill the beans after I return Sunday night!

2012: A Year in Pictures (and a few words)

Spent NYE 2012 in St. Louis

   

Easter in Detroit with Ryan and his family

   

Mal and I flew to Houston to visit Berk

 

 ... and ran into a few more familiar faces

 ...

 ....

 

.....

 

Went Up North to Platte Lake with Ryan ...

 

and his family...

  

and the rest of his family

 Ryan popped the question

 and I said "yes"!

 

Jim and Jill came to KC and the Lake of the Ozarks to meet dad

 

and Mal came to KC to help me look for wedding dresses

 Went to Chicago for a wedding and got to reunite the duckies

 

Shot some engagement pictures

 

Spent Thanksgiving in Detroit and had a wedding shower

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Graduated with my Master's in Counseling & Guidance

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Began working at my new job

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  spent Christmas in St. Louis and had another wedding shower, hosted by Mal

 All in all, I would say that 2012 has been a pretty eventful year! I am looking forward to all of the amazing things that are coming up in 2013!

The Difference Between "Talking the Talk" and "Walking the Walk"

While home this past weekend I took some time to sort through the assorted odds and ends that clutter my childhood room. While sorting I came across a box full of all of the letters and cards that I received throughout my four years at Ole Miss. I found myself feeling very nostalgic as I read through these letters from my loved ones, that is until I ran across some from my dreaded ex. The boy who promised you the world but treated you like crap, pulling the wool over your eyes for years? I'm sure you know the type. Anyways, as I read these letters I found myself becoming morbidly curious, what was it that he said over those 2 years that kept me blinded from the fact that he was a total asshole? After reading these letters and cards I realized what it was, pure manipulation. I don't fault myself for buying into his lies and promises because truth be told, I was young and naive, but more than anything, I needed a distraction from the train wreck that my life had become since my mom got sick. Keeping these things in mind, I completely understand how college Quinn would have fallen for this crap, but reading these things as an adult, it took everything in my power not to scream liar at the top of my lungs. Once my mini-rage subsided, I found myself comparing this particular relationship to the one in which I am currently involved. While examining the two I realized just how easy it is for someone to lie to you and tell you what you want to hear, but how it takes a strong person to follow through. This realization made me thankful for having someone who, while he may not write mushy love notes or sing me songs, treats me like the queen of some small country you have never heard of and follows the through on his word. To me it is the difference between promising and producing, I can promise you a pony but unless I get you one it doesn't really matter now, does it?

New Year's Resolution: Wedding Style

Growing up, I always thought that wedding planning would be this amazing experience for my partner and I to share in, a time full of peaceful decision making and nothing but agreeableness.... boy was I wrong. Not far into this process I learned that Ryan and I have very different ideas of what a wedding should be, and unfortunately these ideas have very rarely found common ground. This lack of congruence has made this process incredibly frustrating and anything but peaceful, with both of us often feeling as though we are having to sacrifice integral parts of our wedding fantasy to accommodate the other. How can it be that in a situation full of mutual compromise both of us are left feeling as though we are having to give up on our vision, when in fact it is probably 50/50? Can it be that we are so set on our visions that we are unable to relish in our small victories out of sadness for our losses? So, my question to both you and myself is this; how can we be happy with half of our dream? To be honest, I do not know the answer. I mean, I know the correct response is "marriage is about compromise", but how do you get your head to explain that to your heart? I think the best way to do this is by changing our attitudes and learning to see the glass as half full instead of half empty. I need to focus more on the fact that I got a band I like instead of on the fact that I probably won't get flowers that I like, and keep this attitude running throughout the remainder of this process. Like anything in life, we need to spend our time giving thanks for the things we have instead of ignoring them by crying over the things we have lost. I want to be more positive, more glass half full, because I really want to be able to enjoy this process and I want Ryan to be able to do the same. So, while it is a bit early for New Years resolutions my resolution is this; work on giving thanks for the good and not letting it be spoiled by the bad.

Giving Thanks!

I like November for many reasons (boots, chunky sweaters and No-Shave-November), but fashion aside, I like November because it encourages many people to be more aware of all of the things they are thankful for in life. Like many, I go through my days, weeks and months without giving thanks for all of the amazing things in my life but I would like to spend this month doing just the opposite: being grateful. So, this might be corny to some of you, but it is important to me to have a reminder of all of the good in life and to have an avenue to share these things.

1: I am very thankful for Ryan and the fact that I have found someone I love so much who just so happens to love me too
2: I am thankful for my family, both alive and deceased, and for all of the great memories that we have shared
3: I am thankful for my friends who have seen me at my worst and still love me all the same
4: I am thankful to be graduating with a job, especially when they are so hard to come by
5: I am thankful for whoever created Flamin' Hot Cheetos (it has been one of those days)
6: Today I am thankful to live in a country who gives voice to all it's citizens, regardless of age, race and gender
7: I am thankful for my sweet dog, Gus, and the fact that he is a happy and healthy little boy
8: I am thankful for everyone, past and present, who have served our country
9: I am thankful for this freakishly gorgeous weather and the fact that I have the day off, enabling me spend time outside enjoying everything!
10: I am thankful that Ryan made it back from South Africa safe and sound
11: I am thankful for the little bit of sleet we got today, giving me a glimpse of winter
12: I am thankful for having a fiance who is actually semi-into wedding planning
13: I am thankful for my parents and what would be their 31 years of marriage, having such great role models is a neat thing
14: I am thankful for the ability to learn from my mistakes
15: I am thankful that 1 month from now I will have graduated with my masters!
16: I am thankful that having Fridays off allowed me to see Twilight this afternoon
17: I am thankful that I had the energy to workout today
18: I am thankful for a lazy day during which I can get caught up on work
19: I am thankful for Ryan's family and the fact that I can call them my own in just a few short months
20: I am thankful for the fact that I have a job that allows me to give back
21: I am thankful that we got upgraded to 1st class for our flight to Detroit
22: I am thankful for the opportunity to spend Thanksgiving with some of the people I am most thankful for
23: I am thankful for beer
24: I am thankful for having a future mother in law and sisters in law who are kind and loving enough to throw me a wonderful bridal shower
25: I am thankful for the little bit of snowfall that we got in Michigan
26: I am thankful for a safe, easy and bump-free flight back to KC
27: I am thankful for making the required amount of hours necessary for my internship
28: I am thankful for colleagues that are both helpful and friendly
29: I am thankful for coffee and a wide array of yummy flavored creamers
30: I am thankful for being able to find the time to make it to the gym and work out today, swimming laps what just what I needed for a little bit of clarity

Halloween Monster Pumpkin

I would like to preface this post by pointing out that I never in my life claimed to be an artist, or even the least bit artistic, so go easy on me! Ever since our dog, Gus, was a little monster Ryan always said that he had "bat ears", which is completely true. So, when the time came to figure out what to carve on our pumpkin the idea of Gus's "bat ears" popped into my head and I became inspired.  I decided to turn out "bat ear" dog into a bat-dog, and being that I quickly forget so many of my ideas I quickly sat down to sketch out an idea.  A few minutes and a ton of wadded pieces of paper later I had completed my drawing, I was thrilled with myself. I quickly e-mailed a picture of my sketch to Ryan, an e-mail to which his only response was "you're crazy".

Tracing my sketch onto the pumpkin was not difficult at all, but me, a pumpkin carving virgin, was more worried about how it would look once I had a knife in hand. I must say that the end product turned out a lot better than I was expecting (primarily because I managed to keep all my digits in tact) and the pumpkin actually resembles my sketch! Here are a few pictures of my artistic venture, go me!

Hope everyone has a very scary Halloween!